Trevor’s Grammy Nomination & The Department of Education’s College Scorecard | The Daily Show


A year with so many exciting
nominees and a race
we’re all excited to watch. And, no, I’m not talking
about the election. I’m talking
about the the Grammys. Nominations
for 2020 Grammy Awards are out, and there’s a new class in town. Lizzo, one of three newcomers,
leads the way with eight nominations, including album, song
and record of the year. She’s also up
for Best New Artist. 17-year-old Billie Eilish
was right behind with six nominations.
The two will go head-to-head in all the major categories. Lil Nas X, who has the blockbuster hit of the year
with “Old Town Road,” also picked up
six Grammy nominations. Wow. “Old Town Road”
got nominated for six Grammys. That’s really surprising,
and not that it got nominated, but that it came out this year. (laughter) I feel like we’ve been listening
to that song for a decade now. Like, I swear
I had that song on my iPod. I swear it’s been around
for that long. Yeah. I think that song has
been out for so long, when it came out,
it was just called “Town Road.” That’s what it was. It’s always weird to me
how-how much time passes between a song coming out and when it gets announced
for the Grammys, you know? It almost feels like
when someone responds to your text, like,
a year and a half later. You know? It’s like,
“No, I’m not still up. I’ve got a wife and kids now.
What the hell!” And yo,
with eight nominations, give it up for Lizzo, everybody! (cheers and applause) I’m genuinely so excited
for Lizzo. I hope she wins
every single category. I also hope
Kanye doesn’t make the mistake of interrupting her speech. Yeah, ’cause he’ll be walking
home with a flute up his ass. She doesn’t play games. (imitating flute playing) (laughter) Oh, and, uh, there’s one more
Grammy nomination that everyone
in my house is talking about. Trevor Noah, nominated
for best comedy album. (cheers and applause) And this is…
this is so exciting. Honestly, this is so exciting, because it really came
out of nowhere. I didn’t even know the Grammys
were be being announced. Like, I found out the morning. A friend texted me, “Wow, dude,
Grammy awards! So exciting!” And I was like,
“Did we get invited? Oh, snap! -Second mezzanine,
here we come!” -(laughter) And I’m not gonna lie. With most things in life,
I can be humble. But to get a Grammy nomination
when you aren’t even a musician. Best believe
I’m gonna milk this. (laughter,
cheers and applause) From now on, until the ceremony, I’m Grammy-nominee Trevor Noah. I actually hope I get arrested just so
that the news has to be like, “Comedian Trevor Noah
was arrested last night “after police found
four dead bodies in his freezer. The Grammy nominee was
taken away in handcuffs.” (laughter, clamoring) (cheers and applause) All right, moving on. If you’re wondering whether going to college
makes financial sense, well, now there’s a new tool
to help you figure it out. For the first time,
the Education Department has released information
allowing students to compare earnings
and debt averages. The move gives students
the opportunity to see averages from specific college programs, rather than at the school
as a whole. The department’s updated
college scorecard website lets students search
individual majors at a school. It also lets students see how
much graduates typically earned and owed
a year after graduation. Okay, I think
this is a fantastic idea. If you’re a young person who is
just about to apply to college, this government tool can
help you plan your future. And if you’re recently out
of college and your life sucks, this tool can help you
figure out where you went wrong. Yeah. It’ll be like, “Oh! “So majoring
in underwater pottery “is why I have six roommates! I get it!” And I-I will say, there really
is some fascinating information on the department’s website. For instance, uh, we learned dentistry majors
have higher earnings, uh, NYU film majors, on average, have debt that is four times
greater than their salary, yeah. And once again, this year, the highest paying major is… -having rich parents!
Good choice! -(laughter) -Well done! Look at you!
-(applause) Although, although,
in all seriousness, though, like, why do we
always have to use money as a way to measure success,
you know? Why don’t we measure success
by friends… or love… or Grammy nominations. -I’m just saying,
I’m just saying. -(laughter) Ha-ha, ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha,
ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. All right, but let’s move on
to an airport police chase unlike any you’ve ever seen. Now to the wild police chase
across an airport runway that was caught on camera. Suspect…
the suspected teen burglar trying to escape an arrest
after landing in Oklahoma. NEWSMAN: Take a look
at the United flight had just landed,
and a 16-year-old squeezes between the jetway
and the aircraft and jumps down
onto the active tarmac and starts running. Workers give chase. Authorities say
that the 16-year-old was able to get
into a mechanical room and into the terminal,
and then watch as he drops–
you can see from a distance– from the roof of the terminal
as his pursuers arrive. His landing didn’t go well. He actually broke bones
in his legs. Taken to the hospital. He’s in custody.
He still faces the charge, guys. Goddamn. This kid jumped out of a plane
and then off of a roof? You know what
the problem is here? Everyone thinks they’re living
in a video game. You can’t just jump
off of a building. You got to hit “X” as you land.
That’s what you do. As you land,
that’s how you roll. And also, kid,
what were you doing? The worst place to run away
from cops is Oklahoma. ‘Cause Oklahoma’s
just one giant open field. There’s nowhere to hide.
Yeah, the cops can just walk up with some folding chairs and
be like, “There he goes. Yep.” And then five hours later,
they’re like, “Yep, he’s still running,
still running.” Now, they say that
he jumped out of the plane because he was a robbery suspect
and he wanted to escape. Uh, but I think what happened
was, they started boarding, and then he realized that he was
on a Spirit Airlines flight, -and that’s why he jumped out.
-(laughter) Spirit Airlines.
They won’t take me alive.

100 Replies to “Trevor’s Grammy Nomination & The Department of Education’s College Scorecard | The Daily Show”

  1. I stoped liking Trevor since his comments about Julian Assange. Come back Jon Stewart, your chosen one has moved to the dark side….

  2. Lol sounds like trevor has been listening to Andrew yang. We need to measure success by how well are people are doing. Yang2020

  3. Not surprised about the NYU filmmakers being 4x in debt. College Humor made an entire series about being stuck in student debt, and it featured a comedian who studied at Tisch.

  4. Sometimes I enjoy snippets of cable TV as youtube videos, but I forget I'm watching special interest network monopoly mafia nonsense.

    Thanks for reminding me with long dead award shows trevor.
    The Grammys and oscars are like the presidential debates.
    No one watches the whole thing but goddamn do most people pretend.

  5. Great Video: Johnson & Wales University : FreeTuition Part1))&((Great Video: Johnson & Wales University:Tuition Free Part 2)) Look it up so-call black people ,and learn your true history!!!

  6. They Found Waldo! He was At The Airport In Oklahoma! That's the real reason they were chasing after him. Not the fact that Waldo's full name is Achmed bin Waldo.

  7. It's the castle in Munster, Germany!!!! It actually is a university but I really dont get why they put that as picture in the background! Greetings 🇩🇪🇩🇪🇩🇪

  8. So some fat chick makes a song about how men don't want to sleep with her, and she gets 8 Grammy nominations? What a time to be alive….

  9. i love how the country is crumbling around us and we keep pretending it's not. nothing to see here. please disperse. trump is just a symptom of the problem of the entire so-called white race. you can't project your self-hatred onto blacks forever. time isn't real anyway. if it was it would last forever. it doesn't. thank god.

  10. Hell yeah Noah, you have the best comedy show I have even seen, keep it going, and congratulations on the nomination my brother, you deserve it..thanks for the great laughs..

  11. Why do we have to measure success in money? Because a lot of successful people are good with money. They now how to plan and invest in their future, and think of the consequences of the now. Mind you, you don't have to be rich essentially to be successful. Just not live in debt. Plan properly for that car and future home, plan to take out a loan for college, but use your time wisely to get that job to pay off the debt in a timely manner.

    In the words or Dave Ramsey, "live like no one else, so you can live like no one else." Very powerful sentence.

  12. Anti-White Racist Trevor, just like Anti-White Racist Michelle, both got nominations, sounds about right in today's Anti-White MSM

  13. If you wanna study in this fine building (WWU Münster main building) you just have to pay ~300€ per semester. Next time choose a better fitting image for your topic 😉

  14. Trevor, you are too much! I really hope you win. I know your speech will be so erudite, people will think they are giving out Pulitzer Prizes at the Grammy's.

  15. When he was acting like he was all that about the nomination, I half expected his grandma to come out and hit him up side the head with her slipper to keep him humble.
    But in all seriousness, congrats & hope you win!

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